Santa's New and Improved Weight Loss Plan

Happy Tuesday and Happy Umoja (if you celebrate Kwanzaa),

I know, I know. You’ve heard this story before.

But it happened again.

On Christmas night, while enjoying the evening with my husband, he came back.

That weird little guy who showed up at my door last year, and the year before (if I’m not mistaken).

At first I didn’t see anyone, but then I heard him say, “Down here.”  He was short, about 3 feet tall.

He wore these weird green and red  shoes that curled at the toe.

And, even more weird, this guy had pointy ears.

I said, “I remember you - you’re that messenger dude from Santa! What’s going on??”

Apparently, Santa has slowed down considerably and he's mentioned to this guy how many weight issues he has. He hasn’t gone to his doctor yet (his appointment is middle of January), but he’s worried about:

• Having heart problems
• His type 2 diabetes from being obese
• His constant high blood pressure from getting ALL the gifts delivered before 4:00am in each time zone
• His brand new aches and pains he never had before
• His recurring nightmare of dropping dead of a heart attack mid-chimney while carrying presents to kids, and not being found until his body starts cooking when that family lights their fireplace

And just like years past, Santa specifically asked me for advice. Yeah, I know - why hasn’t he listened before???

So here's what I told this messenger to tell Santa:

• It’s time to up his vegetable intake!

I told the messenger to tell Santa to get his elves to start fixing salads with lots of colorful vegetables for lunch and dinner, and making omelets with spinach, onions, and peppers. The more vegetables he can add, the better.

• Lay off the cookies and milk!

Now that Christmas Eve is over, no more indulging in treats of cookies and milk. In fact, he now has 364 days to create an ad campaign to request that families leave out fruit or maybe a meat and cheese charcuterie, instead of cookies and milk.

And also, instead of milk, please set out some water.

• Start exercising more

Yep - it’s time Santa faced the music. His body is slowing down because of the excess weight stressing his joints. I grabbed the messenger’s phone and dropped the Beachbody on Demand app on the main screen. I told him to tell Santa that there are hundreds of fitness programs that he can choose, from beginner to intermediate to advanced to hardcore. He doesn't have to workout alone - there’s several group classes on BODi to join to be a part of the action.

Plus, he can sign up with me as his fitness partner and we will work together to create a schedule perfect for him.

No excuses, Santa - NO excuses. 

• Get yourself to bed - on time!

Christmas is over now. 

Toy making season doesn’t start until the second quarter of next year or so I’ve heard)...

I informed the messenger that Santa needs to allow his body time to rest and recover from the insane workouts of going up and down chimneys all night and morning long. He also will need to get sleep to activate the proper healing channels in his body. 

Anyway, I sent the messenger back with those 4 things. We'll see if he listens this year….

Have a fabulous day!